Thursday, January 16, 2014

We are not a Montessori family... but we are a Laura Numeroff book reading family!

We just got back from our weekly Therapy appointment. LeiLei goes weekly to a Behavioral Therapist, and let me tell you it it is magic. We have been seeing her since October, and she is phenomenal. Each week she sends me home with a list of "corrections" I can use with LeiLei. Ways to help her comply without getting angry. Ways to help her play with her siblings without becoming the alpha kid in the room. Ways to help her express her feelings. In just three short months she has become a different girl. A loving, tender, caring girl. It has warmed our hearts to see this transformation. We knew there was this tender soul trapped inside of a non compliant vessel. We also knew that we needed help, and we realized we could not help her on our own. We were fortunate to be referred to an astonishing professional who has helped us all.

This week we changed things up a bit. This week, her sister JayJay accompanied us to the appointment. We now need to start getting to the nitty gritty "triggers", and yes any mom can tell you that siblings are triggers. It did not take long for the Therapist to see that LeiLei is the leader, and JayJay has 'no voice' when playing with her sister. JayJay just kind of follows, and gives in. Then when she has had enough she makes it very clear that she has had enough.  LeiLeis' response because she is caught off guard (since JayJay has not been giving her any warnings that she is becoming frustrated) is with anger. So our homework for this week is to work on asking to trade toys, and that we can respond with a yes or a no thank you. Then once the response is made we ask the other person if 'maybe later' works for them. On top of that I have to work on giving positive praise to my girls when they are playing together and working together nicely. I know that this sounds like common sense but let me tell you, giving positive praise for something you think should be happening without praise is difficult to do. So that is something I have to work on.

She has also confirmed that our kids are not Montessori type kids. We do not do well with the idea of taking one toy out, playing with it, and then putting it away before we get another one. We are very creative, we like to incorporate many toys in our play process. We might be playing with a dollhouse, and if you have a dollhouse you might also need a tree house (a weeble wobble tree house works just perfect), and if you have a house you also need a car (brothers remote control Cobra is perfect). For our family this style of play works, but it is not for everyone. No wonder we love the book, If You Give A Mouse a Cookie. The author (Laura Numeroff) hit the nail on the head with her books and our family!!!

2 comments:

  1. The road is paved with both Joy and tears.... but at least you have a road... and help... hugz ILY.

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  2. Wow, I'm so happy to hear that the therapy is going so well. A few bugs to work out, but it sounds like lots of progress. Love, Aunt Linda

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